Cockroaches

Listening to the blues

Cockroaches--Not good. In Hawaii there are lots of big ass cockroaches. As I sat on a couch in the living room of our rented house last week one such animal tried to kill me. It was night. Kimm, Claudette (mom), Emily (graduating sister) and myself sit down in living room to relax after a physically exhausting day spent shopping. Out of the corner of my eye I spy a small cat--oh no that's a COCKROACH! I jump up like a little princess bitch onto the couch. Kimm smacks Emily on her fresh sunburn. "GET IT!" Emily the family Buddhist cries, "NO I can't kill it!" She promptly grabs a flip flop off the floor and aggressively runs toward the cockroach. She smacks it! It runs under the couch where I'm swooning. Claudette begins to laugh hysterically. I shriek "AGGGGHHHHH get it you guys!!! Kimm pulls back the couch with one hand. Emily smacks the beast again and it heads towards the stairs. She jumps from one stair to the next like a small frog beating the roach as she goes. It continues to run like hell. Kimm runs down the stairs like a bear on speed "EMILY----OUTTA THE WAY!!" She grabs Emily by the shoulder and yanks her back as she barrels down the stairway. Emily yells out in pain...HHEEEEYYYY! As Kimm slams herself down at the bottom of the stairs she lets out a primal scream and stomps on the vile monster! DEAD MOTHAFUCKA!!

This happens in some fashion over and over nearly every night.

Otherwise the vacation was sweett.